A Free Write
Twenty years of obsessing, judging, criticizing, negative self-talk; the list goes on of what I chose to put myself through. I use the phrase “I chose” because I let myself go down that road that can lead to a terrible illness, but I also chose to always ask for support and guidance. I’ve had my ups and downs, like anyone, but over the past couple of years I’ve made a change. That change being how I talk to myself, see myself, and treat myself. Friends, family, therapy over the years, have all helped, but I needed to get to a point on my own to make a difference. I realized I was exhausted, it’s beyond draining always thinking about food, how I look in clothes, comparing myself to others. It’s said we’re our own worst critics, but we also need to be our biggest supporter. Every day is challenging at times, but instead of letting something I ate, or the way an outfit looks on me ruin my day, I keep moving forward.
Having lived in Los Angeles and New York City since my early twenties, I’ve been exposed to, and experienced a lot of negative body image and lack of self-confidence. I want to acknowledge the positive pivot of these concepts in society over the past several years. Many factors have influenced this movement and I want to give them credit.
The impact social media and “influencers” has had on society has been extraordinary. Throughout high school, college, and even after, I would read fashion and pop culture magazines and often end up feeling down about myself. The models and celebrities looked beautiful and any that were the slightest bit overweight were shamed for it. The “waif” supermodel look was what women wanted to showcase in the 90’s and it was difficult to comprehend at a young age that was not the norm. The female body ideals have changed numerous times over the centuries, but since the 21st there has been a more positive shift in celebrating diverse female body types. The well-known phrase of the past few years, “strong is the new skinny,” has been well received.
Over the years, Facebook accounts and bloggers began sharing more relatable articles of women of different shapes and sizes, but in my opinion, it wasn’t until the last few years that Instagram accounts have made a major impact. Instagram accounts get followers, and followers are typically people that do what others do instead of marching to their own beat. In this case though, we follow accounts for inspiration, comedy, advice, education, tons of reasons! These instagram accounts have led their followers to living their lives in a more positive direction. A variety of fashion influencers, fitness trainers, celebrities, and countless entrepreneurs have built a beautiful community embracing all types of bodies and being authentic via Instagram accounts.
There is the other side of this, the negativity and the hate that spreads like wildfire. When this happens you have to make a choice to ignore or unfollow. Lots of influencers use applications to edit their photos, make them look thinner, blend and fade stretch marks, throw a filter on, and some admit it, others don’t. If you’re not enjoying and benefiting from following an account, unfollow it for your own sanity. Your social media and whose stories and posts you choose to view should make a positive impact on you, not make you feel insecure or any less than someone else.
Fashion influencers broadening their media on their platforms has increased the diversity of their followers. Influencers that share their personal lives and create a lifestyle brand benefits all. We get to see the reality, behind the scenes, successes and failures which helps create a relatable safe space. I’ve seen extremely successful influencers open up and share about addictions, body image, eating disorders, and family struggles. I myself have learned and grown from these “posts,” as well as many others I know.
Additionally, social media is also a form of education. Several people lack awareness and knowledge on many topics, and when a popular influencer posts something, many tend to pay attention and follow suit. This ties in with fitness and nutrition. The health and wellness community is massive and constantly evolving. With the immense range of fitness professionals and nutritionists sharing their knowledge through Instagram, the options to find accounts to connect with are endless. My views, education, and self-development have grown and improved my self-image and confidence.
Nutrition is based on science and unfortunately many get stuck in the negative diet culture that is promoted, however, this is what is gradually continuing to change. Several dieticians use their platform to educate and properly explain the science behind food guidelines. I myself am one that used to fear carbs, sugar, or eating too much fat, and I’ve learned a lot more from nutritionists through social media. The same goes for trainers and understanding the benefits of different workouts and what’s best for your body to achieve your goals. Women often worry that weight training will bulk them up when it really burns fat and helps tone the body. With that being said, there is a plethora of weight lifting and weight resistant activities, you just need to figure out what works for you. The more education you have the more you realize how irrational your fears may have been.
The positive body image accounts are another very supportive outlet to women and men that struggle with body confidence and or eating disorders. A variety of therapists, people in the wellness world, and others that have a passion for helping others improve their self-esteem and love their body are constantly posting. There is an overflowing number of empowering quotes, stories, photos and so on. Again, this creates a community for people that struggle to connect and feel they’re in a safe space and not alone. Lizzo, Demi Lovato, Megan Trainer, Ashley Ghram are a few of the celebrities that are always advocating the concept as well. It’s amazing to see a powerful woman embracing her body and truly loving it, not easy to do! Everyone loves women empowerment, hence International Women’s Day!
Plus size clothing has made a breakthrough. There was a period where plus size brand stores were not considered very fashionable, and now many designers have expanded their size range and styles to create more contemporary and stylish collections. This has helped since there’s less hesitation and doubt in what someone thinks he or she “can” or “can’t” wear.
The Covid-19 global pandemic is an unfortunate and newer influence to the pivot in body confidence. People had their gyms, routines, trainers taken away from them, and had to adjust to the “new normal.” Home workouts, virtual training, having less equipment than an Equinox, is not a situation anyone was expecting to be in, and for some it is extremely difficult to become accustomed to. I had a lot of anxiety about my gym closing. The thoughts of losing muscle I had worked so hard to gain, losing my strength, and being in the unknown. I realized though that we are all going through this together and I chose to take advantage of new opportunities. I tried new workouts, new instructors, got creative with my space, and overall have been having fun with it. Of course I miss my gym, my trainer, and the social aspect, but over the past few months my appreciation has grown even more. I am to have my health, the ability to exercise and connect with others doing so. Being in quarantine has given me a lot of time to self-reflect and I am extremely grateful.
The majority of the factors I discussed that have helped the positive pivot in body image and confidence may be through social media, but social media is an extremely huge influence in society today. The variety and range of influencers is key because everyone has a voice and attracts different audiences. It’s an ongoing process to establish healthier mind sets and positive outlooks, but continuing to educate, love and accept yourself helps one get to that place, you just have to choose and want to do it.
